Nightmare!

What a performance just to get one regular shaped alumium box into the living room and all set! So it obviously, goes near to the tellie to connect the HDMI. Easy¬ But the Ethernet cable ain't long enough the reach the Sky unit which is in a computer desk in the opposite corner of the room where the old PC is acting as an old folks home for spiders. The phone socket is there too. Fortunately I have two in the living room. Prizes for guessing where the other one is sited.

In yet a third corner of the room.

Now then which cupboard did I keep that phone extension cable?? Can you guess what I said when I opened the cupboard

Well it certainly was not, "new technology is wonderful!" So to cut a long and torturous story short I find and sort out the phone issues. Now, of course, the box is on the wrong side of the tellie. Have you ever moved one of those big tellies? Right good we're away. Hooked up HDMI, hooked up phone and ethernet. Now where to sit with the wireless board and mouse. Coffee table is first choice. Clear off all the unopened debt mail. Spill a glass of coca cola over the joggies! But here we go. The mouse and keyboard actually had batteries with it so no having to go find batteries. A definite plus for logitech in my book. So sorted. Switch on and a beautiful blue light comes on in the case, lights flash and whirr whirr noises emit from it too.

Switch the board on and click----blink-----and I'm on start page! With the laptop I could go and get more coke for my glass. I can put the board across my knees and off I go. But the mouse is on the coffee table! Okay. Put the keyboard on the table too. Quickly realise I will end up in traction or worse. Back to the drawing board. New technology? Aye right.

So enter the dining table. Clear the junk off that one too. Move the computer chair, which has a massage unit built into it, over from computer desk and move dining chairs out into the hall.

Cracked it! Connect one of the external terrabyte harddrives and sit down, relax and play some music. Burst out in a hysterical fit of laughter. No it was natural not hash induced. I just realised that I had spent about £750, wrecked my living room, wrecked by back to play music that I had on my stereo!!!!!!!!!!

Sod this for a game of soldiers. Get a movie on. Oh luxury. This is what it's all about. Great picture, great sound and in the comfort of my own home without having to go out in the snow.

The doorbell rings. " no honest,officer, it is a DVD which I bought legally."